Saturday, July 18, 2015

All I want for Christmas is 2 nights sleep!!


That's two nights SLEEP Santa, not two front TEETH...please hear me clearly....it's not a typical request...but it is mine!  With all this "Christmas in July" business, it's got me thinking about the holiday.  And all I truly want is to sleep, uninterrupted for two nights in a row....hell...one uninterrupted night of rest would do the trick!  Pretty sad that I've been wanting to write about this for weeks, but am too exhausted to put my fingers to the keyboard.  

 I know that I'm not alone.  Every parent has been sleep deprived from time to time.  It's a phase, and this too shall pass. But we have been in a BAD sleep cycle for MONTHS. What I wouldn't give to sleep for more than 2-3 hours at a time.  I'm in a dance with my kids that consumes me from 8 PM until 6 AM....first the fight to go to sleep.  Never, in my life have I meet a better negotiator or staller than my 4 year old. One more book....more water....I need a Band-Aid....I need to pee....really???? I've never seen someone suck down so much fluid as to move the potty meter like this kid.  And I'm the sucker that falls for all of it...one more book...absolutely...I want to promote literacy after all!! More water....of course...it's summer and we should stay hydrated.  You have to pee and it's not a fight....let's go! *Sigh* An hour later we're both fast asleep, I make my escape.  My husband has had the baby down for at least 30 minutes prior and thus beings my "me time".  Where to start???? Clean the house....nah.....catch up on email and social media....such a time suck.....folding laundry while watching my shows....ehh....I should go do some sit-ups and push-ups.....Maybe read....I haven't done that in 4 years...argh!! I've spent an hour frozen dabbling in everything and accomplishing nothing and now the baby is awake. 

I get her back down and call it a night myself...at this point it's 10:30 PM.  Around 1 AM my little teether *who's currently cutting 6 theeth at once* is back awake....this poor kid....if she's not teething, she's been sick.  A bottle and diaper change for my sweet girl and we're back to sleep by 1:30 AM....now I'm kicking myself for waiting until after 11 to fall asleep the first time.  But it's ok.  It's only 1:30....I can still get 5 good hours. And I had that nap from 8:30 until 9:00 PM...remember???  3:00 AM....the loudest whisper yell is in my ear "Moooooooommmmy, mommy, mommy, mommy, mommy, mommy!!" Oh for crying out loud....little mister is hovering over me....it's feels like I just fell back asleep.  Maybe it was a bad dream....unable to locate his favorite "blue blanket" in the dark....the need to potty from drinking a gallon of water before bed....hard to say...but he's up and needing some minor assistance to go back to sleep.  Done....I crawl back into bed.  I still have 3 hours before I have to get up.  It's okay....I try to convince myself. Then I think for a second that I should just get up and do the "me time" stuff I wanted to do at 9:00 PM...no that's dumb...sleep....I need my sleep!!! I'm officially losing it thinking that I should wake up at 3:30 AM to scrub toilets...fold laundry....return some emails...watch Dateline....and do some sit-ups!!

My dreams/hallucinations teeter between being startled awake thinking I'm being called in a whisper scream or I hear "something" on the baby monitor.  OR....and this is my preferred end of the spectrum....my bed...fresh sheets....lightly scented....a dark room that is completely silent, with only a gentle breeze moving in the trees, washing over my body, keeping me at the perfect temperature for blissful rest.....I drift off reading and only awaken by the warmth of the sun on my face and birds chirping.  Nirvana.  I'm sure some day...but not anytime soon.  And that's okay....I love that my littles need and want me and that's what keeps me going....but dammit....I do miss the 8 hours of sleep that used to be my norm!
 

 I implore you, if you have managed to solidly sleep for 6 hours straight, at least once this week.  Be thankful.  And when I crack....because I will, if this cycle doesn't stop soon, please come visit me at the hospital.  But not at night.